Smuggling Unraveler Pillows

Policeman: 'Holy Smokes!'

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

The transparent safe box of Panama

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

Moving in

"It all happened so fast. 'Notable Book of the Year' to the remainder shelves to HERE in just six months!"

Tweed makes a Mockery of the Supreme Court

'Read any good book reviews lately?'

Department of Dot Connection

"Welcome to the neighbourhood. I hope you like savory pies."

Portrait of Sigmund Freud

'Remember, Stevens, things are rarely what they appear to be.'

'Of course there are more bureaucrats than field workers! It's more fun to create regulation, than to actually enforce it!'

'Since the universe is rapidly expanding, there's a lot more that we have to worry about now.'

'Tonight the remains of Jimmy Hoffa have finally been discovered with what appears to be millions upon millions of unpaired socks.'

"Before we make contact with the departed, be aware that all communications will be recorded and maybe used for training purposes."

Pentagon Science Contest: 'You've got a time machine! Just go to the future when scientists figured out how to travel to another solar system, then come back with the solution and win half a million bucks.'

Stanley Hibblemeyer suddenly realizes that he is only a theoretical physicist.

Blackhole Research.

"I downloaded this public sector tender we should consider bidding for. I’m hoping that these new Procurement Regulations will make it a less tortuous exercise." "Based on that first page I suggest nothing has changed..."

Julian Assange

"But if you've given up on a fifth force, how can you possibly discover a sixth force?"

'Sir, the stupidity of your actions was directly proportional to the number of surveillance cameras watching you.'

'So what we thought was dark matter is really dark energy.'

Three people hypnotised by a self-hypnosis book.

"Ok...Look at me, don't look at the ground. put one foot on the next branch. Slowly...Ok, now move your right arm down..."

"I love online shopping. Every day is like Christmas!"

"That book was so cliche. Can you believe the butler actually did it?"

Unpublished Authors of the Big Bangs Theory

'We find the defense and prosecution arguments totally confusing without a doubt.'

"I've just discovered the universe is built from trillions and trillions of lego blocks!"

'The hokey pokey. That's what it's all about.

'So, I told him, 'Reality is for people who can't handle drugs'.'

Heartless Taxation Department