Smooth Rider T-Shirts

'It's not meant to be a fold up bike, but the truck driver I held up for seven miles thought otherwise.'

The Victors

'Of course I'm on the pull - I'm a cricketer.'

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

Bryan Ferry

'May I have the key to your heart?'

'I do so much better with women when I quit trying to understand them and just repeat what they say to each other.'

Sporting snobs talk about hunting on turnpike roads

'Correct me if I'm wrong.' (Everyone holds their hand up).

Pony Love...

"Wow! This car has a continental kit, train horn, smoothed-out firewall, polyurethane bushings and a 2400-CFM fan! I have a long way to go!"

The Language of Love

"It's discretionary income but I occasionally use it for indiscretions."

Lady asking a man to Jump over a gate before her

Social butterfly

'Yes, I did agree to a double date. However, taking two women out at the same time isn't what I expected!'

"I'm getting something to speed things up, Jenkins. A skateboard."

'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

'Fantastic meeting! . . . Just fantastic. Why don't I have my weasels call your weasels.'

"Giddyup!. . . Damn. I think I just wasted 500 bucks."

'For the last time: no, you could not interest me in a cold fusion experiment!'

'Sergeant Major here is going to help us overcome our fear issues...he's ex Army!'

'Let me take you away from all this — I know a much better bar across the street.'

"I prefer to think of it as travel size."

'Oh great. It's Western and I use an English saddle.'

"Sure you remember me. I'm the guy who collapsed here last night... right in front of your... and had to be rushed to the hospital."

Dog Car Rides

"Let's hope his sale pitches are better than his passes."

"You can try all you want, but being smooth is just something you're born with."

'How many effin times!? Skip Sedately!'