Small Talk Strategist T-Shirts

"It's your turn. I've run out of pleasantries for the gauntlet."

Small Talk Outlet

"Well, if you don't want to talk politics would you like to talk baseball?"

"So. . . what's your work name do you the weather, isn't it?"

'I've never had to butter up the boss. I've always been the boss.'

"You're not very friendly. I just asked about your weekend. So what if I don't know you? It's a harmless question!! Why do you have to be so rude?!"

"We can skip his political commentary in 15 seconds when he goes to make another drink."

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"I haven't started playing the violin. I hide my vegetables in here!"

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

"Why so aloof in here? When you're on base, you yak your ass off with every Yankee in sight."

Cocktail party with man balancing drink on head as he eats.

'Oh, I HATE IT when he does that thing with his mouth...TALKING!'

How to Do Small Talk??!!

"My wife and I handle our own finances. I'm an accountant and she's a grief counselor."

"Remember, I want to hear fifteen solid minutes of small talk before you ask for the Wi-Fi password."

'No, Bob, I haven't noticed you haven't spoken to me in 3 days... I just thought we were getting along.'

'It's a silent protest.'

Develop Your Social Skills: Asking Questions is a Great Way to Keep a Conversation Going.

'You say you want to speak to me about a raise?'

"I enjoy being old - my health always gives me something to talk about!"

"But I haven't finished explaining about dollar-cost-averaging." "Sorry, I didn't register for this course."

"If you could have a dinner conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"

"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"

"Please try not to offer expert analysis."

"I find it a very good conversation starter."

Snail slow to react to an ant's joke.

"Lovely weather for it."

"I'll tell you what ... you mingle, I'm going to monopolize a conversation."

"Jim is a good old-fashioned modernist."

'Have we met someplace? Yes, that's why I quit going there.'