Slow News Critic T-Shirts

Gift a t-shirt that embodies the thoughtful, unhurried approach of a slow news critic—clever, comfortable, and uniquely personal for their wardrobe.

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"For goodness sake, aren't there more important things in the world? I'm late crowing one day and it makes front page!"

"For goodness sake, aren't there more important things in the world? I'm late crowing one day and it makes front page!" mockup

"For goodness sake, aren't there more important things in the world? I'm late crowing one day and it makes front page!"

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Trump Poutine

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'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.' mockup

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

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"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful." mockup

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

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"The news is so fake, the ads are beginning to look honest."

"The news is so fake, the ads are beginning to look honest." mockup

"The news is so fake, the ads are beginning to look honest."

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Rumors, lies and innuendo.

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'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.'

'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.' mockup

'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.'

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"He really hates all the fake news!!" mockup

"He really hates all the fake news!!"

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"Our intelligencia said we will be outnumbered 100 to one, but that we can hope it's only fake news."

"Our intelligencia said we will be outnumbered 100 to one, but that we can hope it's only fake news." mockup

"Our intelligencia said we will be outnumbered 100 to one, but that we can hope it's only fake news."

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"What kind of politician would I be if I didn't politicize this crisis?"

"What kind of politician would I be if I didn't politicize this crisis?" mockup

"What kind of politician would I be if I didn't politicize this crisis?"

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'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,' mockup

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

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"Political cartoons that make people think? Are you crazy? We don't want to distract our readers from the weather forecast, the horoscope and the advertisements!"

"Political cartoons that make people think? Are you crazy? We don't want to distract our readers from the weather forecast, the horoscope and the advertisements!"

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"If the headline screams catastrophe, but nobody cares to read it, does it still make a sound?"

"If the headline screams catastrophe, but nobody cares to read it, does it still make a sound?" mockup

"If the headline screams catastrophe, but nobody cares to read it, does it still make a sound?"

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A slow Day on the Rolling News Channel mockup

A slow Day on the Rolling News Channel

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'If they're so darn 'fair and balance,' why are all the reporters people?'

'If they're so darn 'fair and balance,' why are all the reporters people?' mockup

'If they're so darn 'fair and balance,' why are all the reporters people?'

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"Sorry, but your life moves so slowly that the ball keeps timing out."

"Sorry, but your life moves so slowly that the ball keeps timing out." mockup

"Sorry, but your life moves so slowly that the ball keeps timing out."

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"As you can see here - slow the tape, guys - these sparks are coming awfully close to the truck's gas tank, an explosive situation indeed..." Every high speed chase needs a color man.

"As you can see here - slow the tape, guys - these sparks are coming awfully close to the truck's gas tank, an explosive situation indeed..." Every high speed chase needs a color man.

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