Slam Dunking Sage T-Shirts

'Just remember, to the winners go the spoils, but to losers go the tax breaks.'

Gary turns 40.

"For the last time, I’m not Bigfoot — I’m Larry from Vermont!"

What's In Her Bag? Coachella Edition!

Learn Guitar In 6 Easy Lessons: Add another fifty difficult ones!

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

Basketball

'Verheyen! How many times have I told you? Don't let your personal life affect your play on the court.'

"I love fast break business success."

Two Players both holding the same cue.

I love Basketball.

"Did you ask the client about product placement?"

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

Basketball.

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

Slam Dunking the Outtray

"Read me back the minutes from the last dip."

YAAY! Slam dump!

'Relax, teamwork always leads to a slam dunk.'

'So then I thought, what's the idea job for a gentleman with my years of experience, wisdom and a desire to help others.'

Athletic Darwinism.

Wang Yangming takes a scroll of knowledge from a crane.

'Son, there's more to life than dunking, There's also making big money from ads, like Yao Ming'

'Found it ... Good heavens! It's the size of a soccer ball!..'

'That's not whitewash....that's detergent!'

'It's all Dewey's fault, coach. Rick was showing me how he can fit an entire basketball in his mouth when Dewey walked up and slapped him on the back.'

'I can't dunk.'

'It's exciting and you make a lot of money, but if you don't win, they flush you down the toilet. Welcome to the pros, kid.'

"Just practice half-court shots - all other shots have lost their meaning."

"There's more to life than winning. There's losing - to deduct capital losses on your taxes."

Basketball net that shreds the basketball.

'I told my teacher I won't be returning to school...'

"The big bucks are in pro sports. So instead of doing your homework, get out there and shoot some hoops!"

'I'm sorry, but you missed too many easy layups.'

The Senior Citizen Surfer