Skincare Savants T-Shirts

'No wrinkles or botox for me: I naturally change my skin every so often...'

'I'm telling you, with the right moisturizer and lip balm you could avoid all of that chaffing.'

Fortune teller sits beneath a sign 'Wrinkles Read Here'

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

"Too much concealer?"

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

'You need to do something about your dry skin.'

'Apply that ointment as directed and call me if the growth does not reduce or it starts to talk.'

Desert Dermatologist

New Twenty Blades

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

'You do Botox?'

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

"Another barnacle?!" "I was a teenage creature."

'As pizza maker, maybe a skin care products site isn't the best idea for an affiliate site.'

"Do you have anything that can help remove dark circles from under my eyes?"

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

'We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?'

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"Stop your whining: as a teenage toad, I had to deal not only with acne, but with warts too..."

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

"A Leading cosmetics company believes our drilling mud would ake an excellent skincare product."

"Couldn't you have waited till she was smiling before you injected the botox?"

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"How come your skin is sooooo smooth?"

Lady Liberty's Self-Care

Tips on how to reduce those unsightly crow's feet.

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

"You were smart to come see, Mr. Lewis. These moles on your back definitely look suspicious."

'Mildred....is that you?'