Singles Night Out T-Shirts

"He's your type--gorgeous, successful, and totally unavailable."

I could have danced all night!

Superheroes Having a Drink

'Doorbell. Must be the sitter.'

Bingo night.

'Would you say your glass is half empty or half full?' 'Whose round is it?'

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

"Botox."

'I'd like to tell you all about it, dear, but what happens in Joe's Bar STAYS in Joe's Bar.'

The Stages of Wine

"Hey. We’re in the doghouse every night. That’s the beauty of it."

'Botox...'

Down on Bourbon Street...

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

'Honestly Gwen, do you really think that guys are going to notice your heels tonight?'

"Do you know what girls want?"

Gorgeous Groovers.

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

'The wife loves to go dancing Saturday nights.'

'Mind throwing him back? It's his round...'

"Let's face it, Michele. We're not getting any older."

For every dog who gets the window seat, there's Steve, the designated driver.

Absinthe Fairy.

"I think you two may hit it off. Craig, here, is an attractive male academic in his early forties who seeks a warm, vivacious woman delighting in conversation, arts, and nature for an evolving romantic commitment, possibly marriage, while you, Vivian, are a good-looking, intelligent, stimulating woman in her late thirties who seeks an educated, unattached, well-bred man concerned with ideas, culture, and the environment with whom to share your life interests and companionship."

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

'She won't even look at me. It's like I'm a banner ad.'

Ladies, welcome to Palais des Beefcakes. Please observe our rules. NO making lewd propositions to our performers and absolutely no touching. No touching. Let's me and you honeymoon.

'He hasn't taken his eyes off us all evening-he's watching us like a Mo-hawk!'

Eric knew where all the real slappers hang out.

Chef's Choice - Restaurant Around the Corner.

"The only thing that still works well for me is hysteria."

'This place looks welcoming enough,Alf!'