Siblings Pillows

Seder Plate Symbols Explained

Non-Denominational Carols

Self-Help Books Families for Lockdown

"Sorry, guess I didn't get the email, the DMs, the Snaps, the Facebook comments, the LinkedIn messages, or the TikTok duets."

"That's strange. I remember it differently, in a way that aligns with my world view and casts me in a positive light."

Baby in womb chooses from multiple choice pregnancy symptoms...

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"Because of inflation, I'm going to have to let two of you go."

Thanksgiving Boxing Ring

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

Tiny Tim, who did not die, grows up to marry Little Nell, who did not die, either.

"I think it is most admirable," said Alice, "that you gave up a thriving law practice to be with this lovely child."

"I hope we can flip it before the tide comes in."

"I guess we'd be considered a family. We're living together, we love each other, and we haven't eaten the children yet."

'Ocean view, or would you prefer to watch them fight over the will?'

'I thought we were going to play doctor?' 'We are playing doctor. I'm a lawyer and I'm suing you for malpractice.'

'Look,if you're going to hang out with us, first thing you gotta' do is lose the bell.'

"To be frank, officer, my parents never set boundaries."

Smartphone Holiday.

"We won't know till they're older which one is the evil twin."

"We're all together watching television, but we're not all watching television together."

"Please, Al. You know the backstroke scares the children."

"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to far, go together." - African proverb.

Unsocial Networking.

'Skip the meal more room for dessert!'

"Why can't you be more like little Hester Prynne? She's getting straight A's."

"I'm Jewish and Don is Catholic, but we're raising the kids as wolves."

'What seems to be the problem? I only have one 'like' for dinner?'

'We're under capitalized. As soon as we reach the break even point we'll buy a lemon.'

"We don't believe in pressuring the children. When the time is right, they'll choose the appropriate gender."

Family working together

'Depends on how many people in the yard.'

'I can't afford to absorb the overhead anymore!'

'You've changed.'

I'll trade you a gluten-Free Sandwich for lactose-free milk.