Showstopper Seeker Pillows

"Thank you! And now for my finale, I shall produce a magician from the hat."

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

Woman crying with happiness.

Boom

"Do you realize that you and I have it in our power to cause quite a brouhaha?'

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

'Barry I think it's time you had your eyes checked!'

"Oh, don't mind us. We boo everybody."

Chess on TV

'I told you I'd make you a star.'

Fan-Centric Stadium

Arch of Triumph Save

'6 One-Act Plays By 6 World Leaders'

Don't put your daughter on the stage Mrs Worthington.

'Your performance review is next Tuesday. You're allowed to bring a guitar and up to three backup singers.'

'You said to come back once I got my act together.'

"Thanks to my new glasses, I can enjoy a good old "bird's eye view" again..."

I didn't dress this way to go unnoticed

'Mind if I wear it to the door? I want to test audience reaction.'

"This one's for me."

Little guy using telescope to see past a big guy blocking his view in the crowd,

"I've been working exclusively on my core."

"He should get a Nobel prize for thinking he'll get a Nobel prize."

"As fans we are smart enough to understand the game, but not smart enough to realize how unimportant it really is."

"Tonight's performance has been canceled, because the star of our show has decided that musicals are stupid."

Matador.

"This is a cover of a song that was perfect in its original form. Apologies in advance."

Big circus elephant balancing on one foot

Budget Opticians.

"You're gonna love this guy's act. He's, like, 'not funny, funny, not funny.'"

Mic Drop

"And so it begins... Now where'd I put my dang glasses..."

'...and, if I don't get a place, I'll kill myself.'