Show Biz Fan Prints

'We've got 'Jumpin' Jake' Stevens on drums, 'Slick' Chuck on bass and 'Wasted Pete' Walthons on the trumpet.'

"Check this out! Abracadabra!"

"Sorry, you're not cut out to be a mime artist."

"Granted, there's no business like show business, but that's not the business I know."

Showbiz Awards

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

"We both see Ben as this summer's breakout child."

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"I love being your agent, Nick, but the guys making the really big bucks now are the managers. Let me be your manager."

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

Super Bowl Halftime Show Barbra Streisand reads from her memoir.

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

Music Hall Dancers

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

"Is it 'Measure once, cut twice?' Or 'Cut once, then measure?' Or maybe it's..."

Cleaner cleaning under the feet of the dancers as they perform

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

Hollywood producer.

'I'm a star!'

TV stage door

'No, I've never been in a TV reality show. My reality is pretty well scripted by my wife, kids and boss.'

Clive Anderson

Bette Midler

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

'Call you back - I'm with my agent.'

'What a strange episode -- they just voted Ricardo Montalban off the island!'

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

"If I had been on 'The Brady Bunch', which I wasn't, I'd have been Greg, whom I ain't"

Child star Fatty Deposits humiliates Zippy, The Wonderdog, on the set of their latest movie, 'Too Cute For Comfort'....

Animal Actors

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

"You can stop any time, sir. I've already told you I'm not wearing a body camera!"