Short And Sweet Mugs

Short boy on the tube holds onto a ladies ponytail for support.

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

'I'm collecting manure for my strawberries.' The woman says, 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

Hold those deer to you near to you this Christmas.

Pete was too shy to tell Jenny how he really felt about her instead he just sent flowers over the internet.

Valentines Day truck

'I did tell you there were speed bumps in this via.'

'Thanks to his brilliant conversation techniques, Bob had the shortest calls.'

"If I had a restaurant, it would be called the Can and Microwave"

"My fuse about my height is about as short as I am."

Clarence always halved lots of cargo.

"I expected it to be a lot busier on our opening night."

'Thaw for 24 hours. They should have told me that yesterday.'

"There, there. Try to remember how much he annoyed you."

This is the shortcut!

"You look so beautiful. Twinkling in the moonlight."

I see you. I deny everything. I have PROOF that in order to keep your patrons coming back, you've quintupled the amount of caffeine in everything you sell. I SAID KEEP THOSE STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKES COMING!!! Anecdotal evidence is not the same thing as "proof." I see you.

"I'd steer clear of that guy Jill, he's all sorts of trouble..."

A man irons one of his pant legs.

I've seen an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes. What on earth are you talking about, little buddy? I watched more than 80 movies last night on Hulu, for free. Are you talking about trailers? When it shows the beginning, middle and end, it's a movie.

'Psst, I know a shortcut.'

Heading of with a packed bag

Recipes from Second-Rate Mom Magazine

You Skimmed My Tweet

Now You can be Taller Than She is: 'Bungee cords.'