Shopping For New Clothes Mugs

'You'll like this suit. The vest is edible.'

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

"Some fitting room. Nothing fits!"

Leda knew it was serious when the visited Ikea together.

Penguin suit fitting.

Notice: this dress will be out of style by January 2009.

Man and woman buying furniture.

"Go with the horizontal stripes. It'll make me look thinner when I stand next to you."

'Pink isn't EITHER the new black!'

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

"I'll throw in a few extra pinstripes."

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

"It's been unanimously decided that we don't like this table. Could you show us another model?"

Den Furniture

How would Madam like to pay?

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

"It's also a flat-bed scanner."

A tailor measuring a large man

Sketches by Boz - Monmouth Street

"Hmmm. Not sure it will go with my wife."

'This one's got a mahogany finish, easy to assemble and comes with a magical kingdom as standard.'

"Sir, there are no waitresses or menus — this is Crate & Barrel."

"My husband said, 'We were getting low' on the essentials!"

'We'll take it. Come along Rex.'

Men see an old lady in a round hat from the back and think she is a pretty young lady.

'And the 'World's Greatest Boss' mug comes with the desk.'

'Now THAT'S what I call a love seat!'

"I finally figured out what was causing my backache. You know that fancy modern office furniture I ordered a few weeks back? I just realized. I've been sitting on the wastebasket."

Ikea for Hippies

"Relax, I'm coming for the suit."

"Would you like your real size or one that artificially inflates your ego?"