Share Price Chaser T-Shirts

'I am going to recommend a stock that has consistently outperformed the market since Tuesday.'

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

Sales chart is buildings in background.

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

"Right, before we look at the covid figures for today, do we need another sheet of paper?"

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is, none of us will be alive then.'

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

ACME Balloon Company.

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

Let's Celebrate

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

Gloat

'Perkins, you really know to suck the joy out of a 3rd quarter report.'

"I never dreamed I'd ever enjoy watching my figure this much."

"Thank you, Harris - I get the picture."

'And right here they merged...'

Greatest hits, Greatest Misses.

"Oh, I can't complain"

Dragon Graph

Sales Chart: Boomerangs LTD

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

'This is why we can't have nice things... '

Counting my Bonus...

Unusual Offers

"We've met our target on a 25% uplift in sales but that still leaves us 100% bankrupt."

'And you'll be pleased to notice, sir, that we had to eliminate the top of the chart.'

'Our fund lost millions, but the good news is our management fees are not based on performance.'

Business Partners' vows

"This is where things started getting really weird."