Share Market Maverick T-Shirts

What exactly do you wish to punch him on the nose about, sir?

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

It's okay Mom! As a broker, I'm under supervision of the SEC!

'I think I know what the problem is!'

"I'm as progressive as they come, except for my money. No one touches my money."

"For details on the bear market, here's a bear..."

"That new drug causes flatulence."

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

We need to put more money into Lithuanian sardine futures...I think that warrants bonuses all around!

Dow Jones drop

Elevator Pitch

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"How's this for transparency: Our product isn't organic but our bullshit advertising it!"

His temperature appears to rise and fall with the FT index

'These latest figure are encouraging...'

"Jerry's blood pressure jumped to a six month high on News of the dollar's weakness."

'The market shifted on me.'

Vulture sitting over a plummeting graph.

"My name's Edwin, and I'm addicted to risk."

"Did you ask the client about product placement?"

'If you must know... I got the ten-million-dollar bonus this year because... instead of losing 15-million-dollars, we could of possibly lost much, much more!'

'You have a balanced investment portfolio. Everything you own is losing money equally.'

'We need to target the rich and stupid.'

'That concludes the annual report, I will now fend off questions from the stockholders.'

"Which way up do you want it?"

The Contrarian funds

The End is Nigh

The two faces of capitalism.

'What do you mean your telling me, 'stash it under the bed' is your best advice in the current financial climate?'

"AXP 0.78, AIG 1.12, T 2.63. . ."

'My market doesn't understand me.'

"My mommy suggested I try a different advertising approach."

'It's an emergency, Doctor. The vitamin company needs an endorsement.'

Got out of the market too soon; got back in too late.