Sexual Education Teacher Pillows

Department of Gender Studies

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'You know they've reached puberty when they're more interested in Dr. Ruth than Babe Ruth.'

"It says here that humans are the only member of the animal kingdom who can have sex any time, any place."

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

'Of course he didn't believe the stork story. Try telling him we made him with a 3D printer.'

'Son, it's time we had a little talk about the Byrds and the Beatles.'

Sex Education

The sperm and the egg: romance in action

'Oh, no, those aren't the kid's drawings. Dave is taking adult education art class.'

"We're going to start with the birds and the bees and then work our way up to the new reproductive technologies."

'What's oriole sex'

"This 'birds and bees' stuff,' Dad - Has it been fact-checked?"

"It was time you learned."

"You are here."

'Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?'

"Oh yes, the stags fight and prance around to impress us, but in the end, we decide who we mate with: we have the power!"

"Dad, where did I come from? The stork?"

The future Mario Andretti about to be conceived

"Buddy, no! Remember what they taught us in sex ed!" "Don't care."

"Well then, can I at least call you sometime?"

"The vampire can come... I'm prepared!"

"I know all about the birds and bees, but what's all this about 'erectile dysfunction?'"

The Joy of Sioux

'I believe the word you want is condom, not condemn ... unless you plan on having very unsafe sex.'

'I have a question...am I a bird or a bee?'

'What sexual position produces the ugliest kids?. . . Ask your mum.'

AIDS prevention

"All I know is this sounds like the kind of thing that could get a political appointee in trouble."

Sex Education: "Here's one we prepared earlier..."

'I'm just waiting to see when I will be preoccupied with sex.'

'It's probably a hormonal thing.'

Tele Condom

'Aborting mission! Primary invasion force captured and enslaved!'

'Jeremy, you disgusting little pervert!'