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'Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?'

"It says here that humans are the only member of the animal kingdom who can have sex any time, any place."

'You know they've reached puberty when they're more interested in Dr. Ruth than Babe Ruth.'

'Of course he didn't believe the stork story. Try telling him we made him with a 3D printer.'

"That was some climax, Hon."

'Oh Darling, I'm so proud! I wish I could give you a big hug!'

The sperm and the egg: romance in action

"We're going to start with the birds and the bees and then work our way up to the new reproductive technologies."

"I don't really know much about safe sex. I skipped the fourth grade."

'What's oriole sex'

School administrator of the year "Accepting for Susan Curtis is her clinical psychologist."

"This 'birds and bees' stuff,' Dad - Has it been fact-checked?"

"You are here."

"Oh yes, the stags fight and prance around to impress us, but in the end, we decide who we mate with: we have the power!"

"I know all about the birds and bees, but what's all this about 'erectile dysfunction?'"

"All I know is this sounds like the kind of thing that could get a political appointee in trouble."

"Buddy, no! Remember what they taught us in sex ed!" "Don't care."

'What sexual position produces the ugliest kids?. . . Ask your mum.'

"The vampire can come... I'm prepared!"

The Joy of Sioux

'I'm just waiting to see when I will be preoccupied with sex.'

'I have a question...am I a bird or a bee?'

"Well then, can I at least call you sometime?"

"Sorry, kiddo. Your old man has to work so you can go to the best drug trials in the country>"

'I believe the word you want is condom, not condemn ... unless you plan on having very unsafe sex.'

'May I be excused? The pressure is getting to me.'

'It's probably a hormonal thing.'

"...good night lube, good night lair, good night noises everywhere."

'Jeremy, you disgusting little pervert!'

"... and that this ham we're eating has enough sodium to give us high blood pressure. That's what I learned in school today."

'Aborting mission! Primary invasion force captured and enslaved!'

Sex education, Mrs Griffey...Be responsible! Don't foolow in your parents footsteps!

'We're studying child birth in sex education. On my birthday I think YOU should get the gifts.'