Service Enthusiast Prints

'You mean you want good communication and competent service?'

"Yes Mr Wilkins, we do provide a comprehensive 24 hours service but I'm afraid that doesn't include a cashpoint facility."

Coffee shop request for tea in china cup.

'I appreciate your enthusiasm in serving me but I never tip more than 15 percent.'

"I've added eighteen percent to your bill because it's more than fifteen percent."

"Thanks for waiting."

Information. 2nd. Opinion.

"Just near the waiter!"

'I want to complain to the manager.' - 'Sorry sir, he's out at lunch.'

'Hi, my name's Mandy and I'll be your culturally inappropriate annoyance this evening.'

"How is it you can commit to world class service but not to me?"

"I appreciate your enthusiasm in serving me but I never tip more than 15 percent."

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

"Here's something extra to cover his lousy tip. Blame his fifth grade math teacher."

'The customer is always right...'

Fast Food Restaurant

"Your confirmation number is 7913842461. To hear this information again press 1."

"Be careful, this plate is… never mind."

DIY Butchers

"Maybe you're not underemployed - maybe you're just overeducated."

'I apologize for repeatedly asking if everything is okay, but displaying customer concern is part of our mission statement.'

DIY store.

"How am I supposed to know what I want to complain about before you've even said anything?"

Crazy Ideas

"I know it's hard to shift gears coming here from your day job as an editor, but the customers don’t like their drinks watered down."

"Hang on hon. A table with a more expensive tab needs me."

Boy cleaning servant's shoes

Deux Ex Mechanic

'We'll rotate them for free but you have to pay if you want 'em balanced.'

'I never get tipped!'

'I've done most of it - You'll only need to put it together again and make it work.'

"We found the reason for that 'whining' noise, someone had left TalkRadio playing."

"Typical. They're happy to benefit from our service but just try and come in as a customer."

Friendly bank/Formal bank.