Serial Show Binger T-Shirts

"Daft? You've sat there watching it for nearly two hours, and all you can say is 'daft'?"

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

'There's nothing on.'

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

'And now on the comedy channel Jose Mourinho's latest outburst.'

Star Wars Audience

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'Now that's Real TV!'

"Aye, 'tis the elusive Moby Dick!"

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

"I watched a Lassie marathon today and realized that I really need to step up my game."

'He ordered those 'natural male enhancements',and now he watches football all the time!'

'Did I doze off for a couple of years? Since when did cupcakes become a big deal?'

'I don't believe in blind dates... the last time I got fixed up I got neutered.'

Wordplay: Me.

TV Watch(ing) Dog for sale.

"It's 100% commercials."

"This is why the doc said to not binge-watch the Eating Channel!"

'Confused about your future, depressed, lacking confidence, not sure who you can trust...I'd suggest you avoid any election news and watch modern family instead.'

'I wish I'd never seen Lost, now.'

"I never said I liked this show...I'm only enjoying it because you hate it."

"You seem very remote."

A man watching t.v. with his skull hinged open to reveal the same man watching the same t.v. . . .

Couch potato.

'Thanks for tuning in - we'll try to pander to you.'

Will Smith's Oscar

English People With Servants Having Problems - On Demand

"I don't believe the "Smart TV" is the one always turning to women's beach volleyball."

"I'm just saying, if you had to turn off the TV, would you still remember how?"

'This unexpectedly concludes tonight's program -- the sponsor bailed out.'

'Not another elimination show!'