Senior Loved Ones Mugs

"Shall I compare thee to an autumn day?"

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

"At a certain point, I bring them back."

Grandpa gets more than he bargained for when his lawnmower takes flight as a helicopter would.

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

Road rage on a mobility scooter.

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

An old man plays a prank on the grim reaper

"The nurse thinks she's sneaky, but I know my meds are in the peanut butter."

". . . and wipe your feet before you go inside."

'Come die with me.'

"They've swapped the pub for staying in and taking their meds."

Dino Snack

Pensioner's Romance

"Alexa...order my shopping!"

'It could be hours, or it could be weeks. He's determined to hang on until he finally understands the punchline to a joke everybody else got at a cocktail party in 1947!'

"My doctor said I have 'a reptile dysfunction.'"

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

"Holy smoke. What kind of frosting is that?"

"America's Funniest Colonoscopy Videos."

Remembering His Marbles

'He won't start up on cold mornings.'

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

"And for you older folks, the current time is 'nowadays.'"