Senior Citizen Humor Lover Mugs

"You look amazing Dad. Has Mrs Arnold been ironing your face again?"

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

'As a matter of fact, I have the heart of a 30-year-old woman.'

'Of course I want a short back and sides. I've only got a back and sides.'

"I see Joe Bosco passed away." "Yeah. I heard he laid down the boogie and played that funky music til he died."

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

Adam and Eve, as old people.

Shirley Temple...The later years.. - 'Animal crackers in my poop...'

"At my age, your legs and bowels begin to go."

'We all shrink as we get older... You'll just have to be a little patient!'

A senior moment.

James Bond: Senior Years.

David Blaine, Age 60

"What say we shake things up a bit, and go in and ask for a couple of home-pregnancy test kits."

Mort, the doctor says you can't get too riled up. It's bad for your heart. Yes, dear. You're not a young man anymore. You're not in tip-top shape. You don't eat well. You're not so muscular. I'm not a fan of your haircut. Nurse!

"Our house must be haunted. When I look in the mirror an old geezer-goat stands in front of me so I can't see myself."

"Yes, dear. I'm pretty sure it's 'granny panties on the inside, pants on the outside.'"

'He won't start up on cold mornings.'

"You're getting more wrinklier, grandpa. You should drink more water."

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

'It's sadly ironic in a way - He can't hear the hearing aid commercials.'

"Don't let old age get you down. It's too difficult to get up again."

Old man has a walking stick case.

'Hello, handsome - is that a Billy Cotton ringtone?'

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

'Did someone say something?'

"He may have a royal flush. He may have a pair of twos. It's impossible to tell since he had Botox."

Can't stand him. He really gets on my nerves, he does. Old curmudgeon embarrassing himself like that."

"You ain't wearin' a brassiere." "How could you tell?" "Cuz the wrinkles are all stretched out of yer face."

"I know I'm getting old when one big fart throws my back out."

You know your getting old when you have to put on your reading glasses to trim your eyebrows...

Life begins at 60

Getting Old Sucks: "Incontinence hotline. Can you hold please?"

Things You Say When You Are Officially Old - Volume # 2