Self-promotion Skeptic Prints

'I hear he's quite a recluse - doesn't even have a blog.'

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Mental Wellness Center. Some folks coming here are working on multiple issues. Earlier, I saw a germaphobe with a fear of flying. Using an airplane bathroom must be completely out of the question! There's a narcissist with math anxiety and a fear of public speaking. He hopes one day he can stand in front of a large audience and count all the wonderful qualities he believes he has. And that guy has claustrophobia combined with a fear of success. Looks like he's going through a rough period

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

Creativity 2.0

Blog Breakdown

'You've probably heard of me. I'm an author, consultant and lecturer in the fields of authoring, consulting and lecturing.'

"And afterwards, I'll be signing my new DVD of this presentation in the lobby."

are you so alienated from any real form of community that you can no longer distinguish between belonging and conforming?

'Okay, whatever you do, don't follow THOSE dreams.'

"Look at me, everyone! I'm amazing!"

Recycling Depot - Magazines, Newspapers, Free CDs, books, 8 page pull-outs and other promotions

That's weird - every time I call the self-help hotline, it goes straight to my voicemail.

"He's brilliant, exactly like me, and a lower paid version."

'My tutor kindly agreed to help!'

Cash Rebate

"I'm in advertising. . ."

"I'm doing a think piece on me."

"There's nothing much happening tonight... so I'm going to just talk about myself!"

"Geoffrey's new year resolution was to give up self-respect."

New From Why? Books

"Jazz fusion, modern country or my podcast - my podcast it is!"

'If you want to brag about yourself, start a blog.'

"The Seven Warning Signs of Seven Warning Signs"

"...No, he can't really fly...no, the bad guys really don't have a ray gun...no, this cereal really isn't the best food in the whole world...no, it won't make you as strong as a giant..."

"Nothing showy, but we would like to be publicized."

"The improvement is the higher price."

The Sponsored Skier

"What do you do?""I'm a layer. The law. I do law. I practice law. I'm an attorney. Something legal."

"It's flu season, so you'll probably get sick. To repeat: You... will... get... sick. And when you do, there's Helpaflu."

I must say, that's the most pathetic bar promotion I've ever seen. Tuesdays! Wet Socks Contest!

The Social Media Expert

"It's not as good a deal as it sounds - it's based on THEIR lifetime."

This could be your blurb.

"Thanks to Trump, no one cares if we lie now in our advertisements or press releases."