Self-care Advocate T-Shirts

"I feel we're making progress."

"...and it was at this point that I started taking better care of myself."

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

"You've been a big help. I finally feel like I have my head on straight."

'A harmless mole - but keep an eye on it.'

Suddenly Maude regretted getting botox.

"You're over reacting. Everyone gets a gray hair."

"Wanda, I INSIST you stop referring to yourself as damaged goods!"

'It hasn't been bothering me. Of course, I don't have to look at it.'

CHEER UP!

'I've found black to be a very slimming color.'

'So, how did the collagen treatment go, Dear?'

'Dr Franz? Where can I find more of these support hose?'

'For your high blood pressure, I prescribe exercise and weight loss. For your stress I prescribe exercise and weight loss. For your headaches, I prescribe exercise and weight loss.'

'Tell Harley to use hot packs on his back, and if that doesn't work, try cold packs.'

"Just Breathe, and think to yourself, 'what does my heart truly desire?'"

"It's always nice to fit some self-care into my busy schedule."

Dressing Rooms: Now With Dimmer Switches

Leopard with Spot Remover - "Why can't you be happy the way you are?"

'Mom's Spa'

Fat lady standing on a weighing machine. It's print out says 'I Quit!'.

'Hydrotherapy and a massage... now THAT'S what I call a great spa!'

"I'm sorry we don't restore antiques."

Breast Height Chart

"With what's been going on it's natural to feel depressed, riddled with anxiety about the future, unsure of how long one can carry on taking the pressure..."

"I'm the angel of sweatpants. Did the angels of depression and regret show up yet?"

"The bags under my eyes have combined to form some kind of face backpack."

"Yeah, your inner child called. They want a nap, a juice box, and a restraining order." "Ruining whoops, running a country is tough. Maybe I need to relax and channel my inner child."

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

"Whenever I'm feeling down, I throw myself a parade."

"I decided to spend the money and have my legs waxed."

"What if it turns out you're not even a late bloomer?"

"It's too late for a nose job and too early for a face-lift."

"Sale. Save 100% of your energy by closing this website. Close now. No, thanks."