Secretive Tinkerer T-Shirts

'Remember, what happens in the basement stays in the basement!'

Pounding speeds up the computer.

Robot Parts $5

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

The Computer Bore

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

MacGyver's Cat: 'You see, I took your bed and two paper clips and made it my bed.'

Early cyborg.

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

Gadget geek.

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

The Not-So Smart Meter

Bicycle sat nav.

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

Congratulations on your retirement!

"No, it's not a bug. Since you keep losing you phone, I purchased you a phone-locating drone."

'Roger's busy making a cat-flap in the kitchen.'

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'3-D TV Kit'

Fixing the Computer.

"I'm not sheltering at home, I'm an artist in residence!"

Sundar Pichai's first doodle.

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"