Searching For Housing Mugs

Affordable housing: no vacancy.

'Well, the rent is a bit more expensive than usual because there are only 1 327 482 other tenants...'

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'I seem to be on the range but 'home' is proving illusive.'

"I know it's small and expensive, but wait till you see all the Pokemon."

"Yes, 650,- euro net rent is a pretty good price and it's a very nice house... By the way, I'm talkins about this house, sir."

"The mirrors really do make this apartment look bigger."

"Just think- if it really was 'unlivably small,' would they have installed a permanent Ping-Pong table?"

"The only thing we seem to have in your price range is a bird box in Billericay."

"This place is cheap now, but rates go way up during hibernation season."

New Homes

Man with head in ground: 'I'm not burying my head in the sand, I'm doing the coal mining search myself.'

"It's a little bit small,but it's got great cross ventilation."

"You can't live in our basement. Your brother beat you to it."

"Hmmm, as far as I can gather, unfortunately, it is an eviction notice: we need to find a new home. . ."

"I'm looking for a house near the park."

Godfrey Hunting for Lodgings

Valentines for Real Estate

Frank and I are looking into moving to that new condo that went up next door

A Room (with adequate light and ventilation, no psychotic neighbors, near a grocery store, in a halfway-decent building in an O.K. neighborhood [not Queens, please God] for under $2000 a month) of One's Own

'Don't be alarmed at closing when you sign you name so many times you don't recognize your own signature.'

'The former occupants were a little rambunctios, but we'll redecorate the apartment for you.'

Tenants and Landlords - 'Are we nearly there? ...'

"If this is a bit beyond your budget then I've got a shoebox coming available next week!"

"I have found a house in your price range, but it will be a long commute every day from Greenland."

'Yes, I know I told you only this morning that the property was within your price range....and this morning it was.'

Real estate: 'Sure, it's a long commute, but the price is right!'

"It's a bottomless pit of despair, washer/dryer in unit."

"I love the exposed brick."

'The owner says you can stay free the first month if you can find his lost TV remote.'

"My parents said I could move back into my old room, but they forgot to mention they sold the house 7 years ago."

"One BHK, two baths, and sixty three plug points."

"This housing shortage is getting ridiculous!"

'At least we have a roof over our heads.'

"Is it me, or as the rent goes up, does the apartment actually shrink a little?"