Sea Skimmer Mugs

'We don't know HOW to surf - Can't you part the sea or something?'

Computer games

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

"Didn't read the book, missed the movie, but I've been to the theme park."

'To be honest, that's all most people read.'

A mother wearing an inflatable duck leads her three children wearing inflatable ducks into the water

'Care of your new hammock. Let's face it, whatever we write here, you're not going to bother.'

'You're SURE that you've played water polo before?'

'I've never done this before.'

"We just want a vacation --- we don't want to learn anything."

"I don't feel inspired to design submarines anymore."

'I gained about two hours a day. I gave up the New York Times.'

Hours of enjoyable calm waters were interrupted by the ocean rearing its ugly head.

'Be patient, a few more strokes and I'll soon have the momentum going.'

'It's called a wetsuit... Keeps you warm, even in icy-cold water... You should try one...'

Ronald couldn't grasp his instructor's insistence on his using oils rather than his preferred medium, watercolour.

Lock Ness picture.

Plastic is killing the sea

"Look, Doc, I'm a penguin. All I do is swim and eat fish. How on earth do I end up with high cholesterol?"

"I refuse to read the safety manual. Last time I tried, it gave me a severe papercut!"

'I'm taking you off three things - breakfast, lunch, and dinner.'

Interest rate remain at all time low...

'I did a speed reading course yesterday.' - 'It's incredible! I read Moby Dick in 27 minutes this morning!' - 'It's about a whale or something.'

'All I really wanted was a swim!'

Aero-Bathing Machine

Man preparing to swim the channel covers himself in goose fat and notices that a man preparing to paddle is doing the same.

Slow down!

Fish trapping a bigger fish.