Screenplay Analyst Prints

"They grow up so fast."

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

Herman Mankiewicz

"Bloody hell!"

"Can you believe you left your job and family to search for this key, and it was under here the whole time?"

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

'You say it's a dramedy? We thought it was more of a coma.'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

"Which should we go see: the straight romantic comedy where the heroine's best friend is a gay man, or the gay romantic comedy where the hero's best friend is a straight woman?"

"Now all we need is a good script."

Puss in Heels

"I have to ask you a few questions. I've written a screenplay. Would you read it?"

"We interrupt this rubbish to give you another chance to switch off."

Dear Diary

"You know that kid that submitted a screenplay to us on the back of a restaurant menu? I'm passing on it. I like the screenplay, but I hate that restaurant."

"I've never been this excited about an anal probe before!"

'Oh man, every time.'

"Less talking, more abducting."

Fredrich March as Dr. Jekyll

"I just don't think a giant flaming blob of alien ectoplasm would say that."

"I'm just a giant, rampaging gorilla, standing in front of a girl, asking her to love me."

"You caught it, you probe it."

"When did movies start being dumb all year round?"

Aliens bring their pet humans to the veterinary

'I'm writing a screenplay that every studio in Hollywood will want to produce. It's about an honest, hard-working, moral CEO.'

Studio 51

The Sting Operation

What the Person Sitting Next to You at Starbucks is 'Working On'

"I've got a little job for you, Kretchmer. I want you to infiltrate the I.R.S. and sow the seeds of compassion."