Scissor Enthusiast Mugs

"Do you want it parted in the middle?"

Afternoon crafts

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

Haircuts

Scissors vendor.

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

The aliens froze, gripped by a primal fear. This time there would be no abduction.

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

"Be creative...!"

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

Hamlet in the craft shop.

'This will only hurt for a moment.'

The Sculptor

"I'll tell you how much wood I could chuck if I could—a lot, like, half a cord!"

'There, THAT tree won't bother anyone anymore!'

"Don't let it bother you. The doctor told my wife it would keep her mind sharp if she learned a new skill."

95 Theses That Will Blow Your Mind!

"Could you hold off clipping your coupons until I've finished reading the paper?"

Man reading on top of giant pencil being carried by others.

'I know it's dark out here - we're traveling faster than the speed of light'

"I'll pencil you in for recess."

A chef uses a giant utensil to chop a tiny sausage.

"Wouldn't it be cool to live in the middle ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords?"

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

A lumberjack leans against a giant pencil that reads "Giant Sequoia Brand No .2".

Battle.

"Heh, I've left a pin on his seat."

Small Business Loan of Pencils

The Lady of the Lake stabs a duck.

Looking Daggers

Sculptor with falling rocks sign.

"Did you enter the correct password?"

"This is a silencerfor my dagger..."

Rodin's Block