Science Satire T-Shirts

"I hope you work out better than my last roommate. He had backaches, dizziness, and an erection that lasted four hours."

"Do you even know how long it's been since you last poked and prodded me?"

'How many quarks in a gallon again?'

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

'I couldn't think of a science fair project so I just re-invented the wheel.'

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

Strainspotting

"I'm going to get you fired."

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."

'Still think nuclear testing is harmless?'

"Can you stop complaining about historical inaccuracy and try to enjoy yourself for one minute?"

"I have good news and bad news about your cat, Dr Schrodinger..."

"The blood test will take a couple of days, but I'm pretty sure it's just ketchup."

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'

Brian surgeon squeezing brains from a tube.

"Not guilty by reason of genetic determinism, Your Honor."

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

So You've Cloned Yourself

Evolution Of The Jet Ski

"I'll tell you, mock jury duty beats cancer testing."

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!

Darwin first tested his theory in a letter to a magazine ('Lookalike' letter points to similarity between man and ape.)

'Today we will lock the monkey in a room...' 'Why do I volunteer for this?'

"Say, do you have time between all that DNA research to invent a non-smelly sock."

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'