Science Advisors Pillows

Well, those election results certainly surprised me. Me too, little buddy. But that's because when I went to sleep last night, I had a dream … that Robert F. Kennedy had lived, he appointed Carl Sagan as science advisor and head of NASA, Sagan took us to Mars in 1991, and Donald Trump spent the rest of his days founding casinos and selling real estate degrees on the red planet. Meanwhile, in the 2016 election, Martin Luther King Jr. narrowly defeated Sonny Bono. I just meant I'd forgotten we wer

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

"Nation-building never works."

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

Ethics exam cheater.

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

UK/US Free Trade Deal

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

Mario Draghi

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

We Tenatively Oppose War on Strictly Procedural Grounds

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

Continuing education.

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

USAID Octopus Wrapping Around Globe

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

'I look forward to a bigger and bolder vision in my 2nd term.'

We need a Europe of U-turns.

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for the day. Teach a man to fish and you can charge a consulting fee."

G7 Summit Concern

US and the EU

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

'Answer these constituents letters. Tell them to go to hell in a nice way.'

Two Ways out of Iraq.

US Credit: 'I'm down grading your credit rating...'

"Just go with the workflow."

Finally I understand why it's called 'Higher Education!'

"Massive deficit spending, enormous Federal bailouts, open borders, ridiculous earmarks, pork for everybody, intervention all over the world.... Now, why didn't I think of that?"

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

GOP exaggerating scale of immigration, inflation and crime rates

'What I have to do first?!'

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'