School Term End Gifts

'I'm getting a little concerned about Timmy. He hasn't wormed his way out of anything all semester.'

"I wonder if Nielsen knows how many demographic units spend September through May in school."

A Puppet Named Juan

Ethics exam cheater.

Computer Room.

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

'But what is the universe for?'

"Sign my yearbook?"

'It's all original research. I had no assistance when I looked it up on Wikipedia.'

Happy kids running abount with a 'Schools out' banner

Billy, can you deliver your show 'n tell this time without the fog machine?

Do your research!

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

"Well, look at the bright side, Timmy — you're 100 percent wrong."

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

'It was bound to happen - they're beginning to think like binary computers.'

Exam

"Can you change this quiz grade from an A to a C? I like to keep expectations low until I blow my parents' mind by acing the final exam."

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

University Soapflakes

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

Four Types of Test-Takers...

"The Langmore Regional High School Inner Debate Team"

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

''C-minus'? ??" Do you know how long it took me to find and download this term paper?'

Procrastinator Foumdation: 'We're putting off the decision to fund you for at least another month...'

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

Type A Freshman - changed courses four times, got a job, organized a protest, quit the job, plans to take second semester abroad.