School Safety Supporters Gifts

'Obese Children' road sign outside school

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

"Very fine people on both sides."

'Tommy's doing fine. I'm concerned about your poor fund-raising record. You sold only two magazine subscriptions and one measly candy bar.'

'I told you hard work would pay off in the third grade, Cate...You've had three job offers.'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"Coronavirus, masks requirements, falling test scores, student violence - we need to be able to pray in school!"

"She's the best nit nurse this school has ever seen."

"We've created a safe, nonjudgmental environment that will leave you child ill-prepared for real life."

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

Educators push back against politically motivated school opening proposals."

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

"Okay, I guess....first we had a lockdown drill, then we had an active shooter drill. Following that we had a fire drill. After that we got to meet out security guards. Then we watched a video on avoiding sexual predators...."

We pride ourselves on having every type of insurance policy, but report card insurance is a new one to us.

'Boasting bumper stickers.'

'It's someone from the Society for Ethical Treatment of Principals asking for a donation.'

'If the key to effective classroom management is consistency, I guess I'm an effective classroom manager, I am consistently exhausted at the end of the day.'

Kid to class: 'I'll read my book report in a minute, but first, a word about our underpaid teachers ...'

"Let's have refreshments on parents' night. These people need nourishment."

"How much longer will we have to help Besty with her homework?"

"Heading to your government schools to be brainwashed?"

'My advice to a first year teacher is to teach from the heart, not only from the book.'

Witch crashes into building on her broom and safety airbag deploys.

"My parents appreciate teachers, but me, not so much."

Congratulations on your PGCE.

Who'll fill in while your English teacher is on maternity leave? Probably and old-bag substitute. Teach English for a couple of months? I'd love to! Umm, nana? Aren't you too old to go back to teaching? Au contraire! They don't want anyone who could possibly get pregnant. Uh-oh. Age discrimination.

"We've unleashed your child's potential—this is as good as it's going to get."

"Hey, look at that. It looks like the stuff we've been using to text each other for years."

"These conferences are a good thing. It keeps parents off the streets."

Teacher's Workroom.

'There's a meeting at school tonight, Dad. The superintendent, the principal, the school board, and you.'

It was clear to Mrs. Bennis how the public school budget cuts were hurting students when she asked Danny for a math formula.