School Run Strategist T-Shirts

'We combine the school run with exercise.'

"We were running late, so my mom faxed me to school."

Wayside Elementary School - Now Available: Curbside Pickup!

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

'Not just my homework - The dog chewed up my whole LAPTOP!'

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

I drive, therefore I am.

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

'It's exactly what I need to drive our only child to school at the end of the road.'

'Any child left longer than ten minutes past last bell will be given a free kitten.'

'My mum drives me to school. She says it isn't safe to walk with all the cars.'

'It wouldn't be right if I did your homework for you!' 'At least you could try!'

"All right, what's it going to take to make this homework go away?"

'You're being evacuated to a better catchment area.'

'That's the bell for round two.'

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

'You got him here before the tardy bell, Mrs. Bates, but I'm not sure he's prepared to learn.'

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

'To be honest I only became a vicar to get my children into the C of E school.'

"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?..."

2000 words was tough, but doable. Billy would play the picture paints a 1000 words card, twice!

'It's time they built a bridge for the lemmings' school run.'

'I don't have a dog, but I do have a dog app that eats my homework.'

"Mom, no more apples for teacher. It looks like bribery."

'I don't know what made Ms. Doan think I was running in the hall.'

'So, you see, Dad, if we compare our overall school performance, I'm actually doing better than you did at my age.'

"I try to get a head start on them."

"Homework is work, and work without breaks is a federal offense that can be reported to the labor board."

"I'll explain later."

Kid sheltering from rain inside a vault box.

'Be advised the information herein may not be current and is subject to change. Past performance is not necessarily indicative of future results.'