School Run Strategist T-Shirts

'We combine the school run with exercise.'

"We were running late, so my mom faxed me to school."

Wayside Elementary School - Now Available: Curbside Pickup!

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

'Not just my homework - The dog chewed up my whole LAPTOP!'

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

I drive, therefore I am.

Will eat your homework for $.

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

'It's exactly what I need to drive our only child to school at the end of the road.'

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

'It wouldn't be right if I did your homework for you!' 'At least you could try!'

'My mum drives me to school. She says it isn't safe to walk with all the cars.'

'Any child left longer than ten minutes past last bell will be given a free kitten.'

"All right, what's it going to take to make this homework go away?"

'You got him here before the tardy bell, Mrs. Bates, but I'm not sure he's prepared to learn.'

'To be honest I only became a vicar to get my children into the C of E school.'

'That's the bell for round two.'

"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?..."

'You're being evacuated to a better catchment area.'

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

2000 words was tough, but doable. Billy would play the picture paints a 1000 words card, twice!

'I don't know what made Ms. Doan think I was running in the hall.'

'I don't have a dog, but I do have a dog app that eats my homework.'

"Mom, no more apples for teacher. It looks like bribery."

'It's time they built a bridge for the lemmings' school run.'

"I'll explain later."

'So, you see, Dad, if we compare our overall school performance, I'm actually doing better than you did at my age.'

Soccer Moms

"Homework is work, and work without breaks is a federal offense that can be reported to the labor board."

Kid sheltering from rain inside a vault box.