School Management Aficionado T-Shirts

'Yes, I received the review copy of 'Running a School is a Snap' that you sent. I found it to be a very useful book.'

'We are looking for highly motivated, confident decisions makers for headships. Is your son such a man, Mrs Smikins?'

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

The little engine that could delegate.

Subordinate Employee

Teacher's Inbox: In One Ear/Out The Other

Leadership Training

The little engine that delegated

'No Mis Evans. You know only substitute teachers are allowed to carry taser guns!'

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

'Well, when you mess up on the job, you know where you stand with me.'

'You can't blame the kids for being restless when we have math teachers teaching French, and English teachers teaching science.'

'For the next hour, hold all calls. I'll be practicing tumbling. I have to learn to roll with the punches.'

"SUPERintendent! What kind of powers do you have?"

'Do you feel as foolish as I do, having a conference with Billy's teaching machine?'

'We've decided to upgrade your position with a new version 2.0 employee.'

'It's important that I see eye-to-eye with any consultants we bring in.'

'I think our mission statement should mention scholarship and attendance.'

"Employee satisfaction is of utmost importance and I'm not leaving this chair till you are satisfied."

"You have no idea how political this place is."

'A restaurateur prepares macaroni and sells it as pasta. I want you to do the same for the educational program at your school.'

"The school construction budget is so small we can't even afford to build a snowman."

Books on running a successful school,

"How do we make sure the students' voices are heard, but get them to be quiet at the same time?"

Company Structure - Boss and his yes men.

'I have an open-door policy, but only until the air conditioner is repaired.'

PTA Meeting Tonight: Parents,Teachers,Attorneys

'The good news is that all the teachers liked the weekend brainstorming retreat. The bad news is that twelve of them are out today with splitting headaches.'

"This is Bernard, our new management consultant. He is going to be responsible for draining the lifeblood out of staff in a relentless attempt to reach increasingly unachievable and meaningless targets."

'It's someone from the Society for Ethical Treatment of Principals asking for a donation.'

"I knew there'd be pitfalls when I became a teacher, but thirty to a classroom is too many."

"It's the superintendent's idea of alternative dispute resolution."

'Parents have been complaining that I'm too strict? You want me to be a little less intimidating? Do you want me to send students to your office 47 times a day? I'm a 67-year-old woman dealing with 16-year-old thugs....

'Newgate, you'll be reporting to Cunningham, who'll be reporting directly to me. I, in one of those unexplainable paradoxes of the business world will be reporting to you,'