School Comic Pillows

'I understand it now, Mrs. Bundy -- the school janitor explained it to me!'

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

The only time cats are known to laugh.

'Right, who threw that?' (giant pupil in class).

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"Where were you between 4 and 6?"

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

Monitor lizard becomes milk monitor.

'School was really exciting today -- they busted up a meth lab in chemistry class.'

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

"I think the teacher who says that I got into trouble today is part of the fake news conspiracy."

'Ms. Blumter, please get me a copy of Educational Leadership for Dummies.'

"I DO have a note from my doctor...but nobody can read it!"

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

'I would love to run for class president, but I'm concerned about the vetting process. I once faked sleep during nap time in pre-school.'

"I thought those D's meant dedicated!"

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

'Before you give us your surprise test, could we have a surprise study period?'

Jim Carrey,

'We can't get rid of her - she has tenure.'

'It's in case I need a laugh track.'

'The dog won't eat my homework.'

'Division is just like addition except you have to use a different button on the calculator.'