School Budget Critic Pillows

"If they're not cutting back on teachers, how come we now have a three-hour lunch period?"

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

"Sorry, new style pain killer. It's the cut-backs I'm afraid."

'The legislation HR2109 would increase state aid to education. Ask not for whom the bell tolls. It tolls for you.'

"You pay taxes to send me to school? Hey, that's where you can save money."

How to make sure he won't see his shadow.

'Ms. Peters, hold all calls. I'm busy implementing yet another hastily conceived and unproven education innovation.'

'The recurring poor enrollment prognostications plays havoc with our school district's budget. What will next year's enrolment be.'

"We’ve been told to cut the drugs budget so in future Louella here will be chanting away your pain."

"The Feds have authorized me to leave your child behind."

'This is just my part in the growing crisis in education.'

Cost of the military.

"Lunar mission cost: $207 million (plus tip)"

'Lincoln Standardized Test Center - formerly Lincoln High School'

Standardized Testing

'With the school's dire budget problems, we're now teaching math by charging ten dollars for the course, as well as the same amount for each of your other classes'

The Illusion of School Choice

"The last person you should be listening to regarding school reopening....

Crowded Schools

'You don't think you were a bit harsh on that school?'

'There's no money to provide 'Care in the Community'...but we have just enough to move him into the carpark!'

Look thru the hole to see budget savings: 'I don't see anything in there...'

"And Boris caims all his spending plans will be financed by winnings on investing £1000 a week in Eurolottery tickets..."

"It's a broken education system when the only solution is more and more homework."

"These days we try not to focus on 'facts'."

Gathering 'Round The Pork Barrel.

'Blimey - they're not bringing back corporal punishment?'

Road to nowhere, made possible by surplus highway funds.

'While the campus master plan does not provide for one, it does not rule out the possibility of a COSTCO.'

'Talk about government waste! A tombstone would have been sufficient!'

"Is this 'No medical student left behind" diploma the same as a regular diploma?"

'Due to cuts, the school will only be open 6 to 10 on Sunday night.'