Scale Sage T-Shirts

'According to the weight chart, if you were a condor, you'd have a wingspan of 97 feet.'

"I like the metric system. My weight in kilograms is less than my weight in pounds."

Weight and Fortune.

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

What's In Her Bag? Coachella Edition!

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

'I love shopping for clothing I don't need with money I don't have.'

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

'Bad news on Wall Street. The entire stock market has been downgraded to a 'junk' classification.'

'My teacher said the school has tough new standards and I need to improve my vocabulary. What's 'vocabulary'?'

'I'm finally at one with the universe...but apparently that doesn't include the DOW.'

'It's not dead, honey. You've just never seen it turned off before.'

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

Daniel Day Lewis & George Glasgow

Melissa's Mark Prediction Service

"Looks like the high tech shares have taken another fall."

"You've done it - you've come up with the perfect password."

'What did the fund manager say to the investment advisor?'

Saguaro Cacti.

Computer spying.

"Is there a dramaturge in the house?"

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

Sales Exit.

'It was pretty crazy around here that day.'

'Of course, for me, Christmas has a deeply felt religious significance! The stock exchange is my church...!

"Anything you say, Mr. Einstein, can be used to explain the origin of the universe."

"Just think, someday we'll be considered 'retro'."

"You're dated look is an absolute tour de force."

"We found a new virus. . . which affects stock portfolios."