Satirical Storyteller Mugs

'While doing the research, keep in mind there are only two kinds of facts...Those that support my position...and inconclusive.'

"As it happened, my work as an accountant transcended the genre."

Please type in your pin number...

'Yes, we do offer free medical treatment. But, our statistics show that paying clients are 100% more likely to make a full recovery.'

'If it pleases the court, my client pleads 'kind of innocent'.'

'Read the one where all the Enron employees are fighting over the paper shredder.'

"What goes around comes around more annoying."

"Are these just guidelines, or are they actual new policies?"

"The beatings will continue until morale improves."

"I didn't say I started jogging, I said blogging."

Gulliver decided to stay in Lilliput and sign a lucrative contract for Long Distance Running.

"It's extremely rare for anyone to suffer side effects from health supplements Mr Baxter. Just how much cod liver oil have you been taking?"

"Monopoly taught me a lot as a kid, things like, you can get out of jail if you have enough money."

"That script of yours - I've never read such a load of cliched second-rate crap...It'll make us rich..."

'I can't say I like your cavalier attitude Benson.'

'I see she found a sugar-daddy.'

'The house has been repossessed by the Devil ...'

I think I've solved our downsizing problem!

'His last Tweet was '#brianjohnson just about to die@dying.bit.ly.om'.'

"He's in training for the gig economy."

"The meetings' minutes can be read in the newspaper's police report..."

"I LOVE this business! Just when you think you've discovered our culture's lowest common denominator, along comes a crazy genius like you to show us how wrong our math was!"

Fired Editorial Cartoonists

Oliver Twist As Re-imagined in the Modern Boardroom.

"Putney, there's only one thing that keeps me from firing you. You know too much and could write a tell- all book."

Police Station: Wanted Poster with man in mask.

"Somebody's got a sense of humour... he calls this one - 'God's gift to women!'"

"It's true. God appeared to Trump in a dream and told him to run for president."

Jonathan Swift

"He takes his role as a funeral director very seriously."

Airlines: 'Excuse me - I have to pay more beause I take up two seats and now I pay extra for peanuts!'

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

'Who ordered twelve gross of aluminium buckets for the bailout?'

'Obama's trying to create the impression we're awash in guns! It's a conspiracy!!!'

'I write non-fiction with a dash of rubbish to confuse the critics.'