Sassy Quip Lover T-Shirts

"Jeez, calm down, Bill. We're not saying you're wrong... Just that you're an idiot."

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

'What? I'm scratching the sofa! I'm not! And if I was? It's your fault!'

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

"If I wanted your opinion I would have hauled you in for questioning."

'You're so nice and friendly that I've got nothing to moan about. That's a bit of cheek!'

When Stupid People Get an Idea

Cold caller.

The Gilmore Girls

'My dear boy its a wonderful display of post modern expressionism with overtones of Dada.'

'Sure you always catch bigger fish than me. Your arms are a foot longer than mine.'

'What do you mean, 'act my age'?... If I did that I'd be dead!'

"Tom, we've started a little office pool on how long it'll take me to get your job. Want in?"

'The part I like best about sex is when I light a cigarette and say next.'

"I've had many men in this town darling, but many men have not had me."

Furniture from hell.

"Your Honor, I would like the record to state that Mr. Katzman is a 'hostile witness'."

Home Business - Wife.

"Does it occur to you that the only thing separating us is a basket of bar snacks? And a flimsy basket at that?"

'Watch your step. I happen to know you're an alpha male.'

'You Honor, my client would like to change his plea to 'pretty please with sugar on it.''

"He damaged a nerve when he pulled the thorn out. I'd have had a surefire malpractice suit if I hadn't eaten him."

"In other words homogenius."

'Perfect birthday party dear, but so it should be after the practice you've had over so many years.'

Cylinder Head

'Not tonight, I have a headache,'

"I wouldn't say that you're old, Dear, just way past your 'Best Before' date!"

'I don't eat organic foods. At my age I can use all the preservatives I can get.'

'You wouldn't be so quiet either if you had to sit on this board!'

'And now the other leg!'

"No offense..."