Sarcastic Santa Enthusiast Mugs

Criminal Santa Claus

Santa Claus's Mail

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

High security Santa's grotto

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"I admire your enthusiasm, but you’re not really flying."

"Anything but milk and cookies."

'You know who's been naughty and who's been nice? -- you're not using DNA evidence, are you?'

'This year I'm deliverying everything FedEx!'

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

Santa CGI Effect

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

'How do you think he stays so merry through the holidays?!'

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

"I want a pony!"

'Well, I'll try, but cheese seems to be the 'must have gift' this year.'

'There really IS a Santa!' Santa busts pets eating his milk and cookies

'And that,and that,and that...'

Why are you insisting on spending Christmas in hospital, Gran? I prefer the Santa here, darling.

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

"Amazon wants to open a facility here due to our friendly labor environment."

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

The Reindeer Strike

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

Pole dancers

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

Attorney At Law: Today's special - Bankruptcy and Divorce. Two for the price of one.

"I can't tel you what an honor it is to be the keynote speaker at the Supply Chain management Seminar."

"I don't see any mention of quicksand skills on your resume."

"If you want to talk to someone uninterested, press 1..."

SANTA'S ATTORNEY

'And the good news is you can finish out your 'Employee-of-the-Month' term before cleaning out your desk.'

Great Moment in North Pole History