Sandwich Sarcastic Prints

One Type of Chicken Sandwich has only mayo...the other has only salad and no mayo. Rubbish!

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

Honest Vending

A Club Sandwitch.

'Kimble, I'm going to give you a chance at purchasing - nip over to the cafe and get me a cheese and pickle sandwich.'

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"Aww geez... peanut butter and jellyfish again."

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

F&E Subs. Hey, you replaced the little swords with periscope-shaped toothpicks! Nice touch, Ernie!

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

Jelly I.V.

"Wow, I was expecting to also get a pearl, but I'll take a panini."

A Grade Two student explains why he is so eager to get back to school.

'Bacon-butties are my favourite!'

"I'm a retired doctor."

Armstrong, an unmarked truck just delivered a pallet of mystery meat. Turkey. It doesn't look like turkey. It looks more like some sort of dehydrated pigeon. What's it matter? If we slap it in a sandwich, smother it in "gravy," and label it "turkey," customers won't know the difference. Wait, did you just think quotes around the word gravy? "no."

"Genetic engineering has made us disease resistant."

Batman and Reuben

"Liverwurst is down an eighth, egg-salad is up two and a half, and peanut-butter-and-jelly remains unchanged."

For the Love of Peanut Butter

One Hour Sandwich shop

'Your French dip, sir.'

"He left with two other slices of bread, turkey, bacon, lettuce and toothpicks. I think they went clubbing."

"I recommend the pimento loaf with pickle. It's bursting with umami."

Holocene, Pleistocene, Pliocene, Miocene, Oligocene, Eocene, Lettuce, Tomatoes, Onions.

I haven't seen Francine in a long time. I wonder how long-lasting couples keep the magic alive. Here come John and Anne. They've been together for decades. Let's ask them. Hello you two! How do you keep the magic alive in your relationship? Never go to bed hungry. You mean angry. This explains those late night sandwiches! And now you want to argue about them? Seems that the magic involved selective hearing. What? Oh - I got distracted thinking about sandwiches!

Carnegie Deli

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

Paninis of the Old West

Peanut Butter and Jam Attack,