Sand Scamperer Pillows

"The bailouts are nice but my retirement remains finding drugs that washed up on the beach."

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

Camel rider sees sign stating: The Next Mirage 16 miles.

Battery Lighthouse

'Good dog Spot. You're always there for me when the sand is hot.'

Segregated Beach

A man plays golf by the sea

'With this ring I thee dropped it -'

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

'This is almost as good as 'Sea World'.'

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

'No surf?'

"This one has nicer sand, but I think I prefer the tree on the last one we saw."

"Ain't no denying it son. It's a genuine fact that the surfers rule."

My broker went to Antigua ... I had to settle for Coney Island.

"The only thing missing is Joe Buck."

Another Victim of Beach Brain

A fat saxophonist on the beach wearing a rubber ring.

'Well, how do I know you're not sitting on a deck chair?'

"We live in the desert. What did you think I meant when I said it'd be a nice day to go boating?"

"I found this stuck in the sand right next to some sleeping people."

Directions to the Bar.

'Oh, yes! I can see it.'

'Don't they look silly?'

'Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch! Boy I hate hot sand...'

'Dinosaur footprints!'

'Meet Bill, my most loyal sailor: I know he would only leave me if the boat were sinking...'

Sometimes you just have to wait for the magic of sea, sex and sand to kick in.

'You are here' sign in a desert pointing to an hourglass.

Boat hits rocks because of dim glow from low-energy lighthouse

Statue of Liberty Underwater

God creates Sahara Desert with sand mill