Sanction Skeptic Gifts

The UK's Russian Sanctions

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

Alternative Medicine

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

The suggestion box.

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

'Einstein's theory of negativity'

'Have you tried out new Labrador Retriever Butt Scent?'

'Too much Omega 3.'

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

Low self esteem workshop - 'You missed it. It finished two hours ago, you useless pillock.'

Suggestions Box

"Sometimes I wonder about what our patients have to take."

"If they de-regulate this place, we wouldn't have to do all those boring scientific tests."

Two plus two equals five. I don't think so. The earth is flat, or maybe it's shaped like a fish. Huh? Many Republican candidates don't believe in evolution!!! Math, science -- who needs 'em really. That's what I said in high school.

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

A shrink charges $200 an hour, but double chocolate layer cake is only $19.95.

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

'I was born with math immunity, so I'm special. I know that.'

Russia had barely got started in Ukraine and "Gas War" against EU

"I totally meant to do that."

"I'm putting you on a stronger placebo."

"Solar flares may be a contributing factor or perhaps it's a negative vibe sensitivity...."

'First of all, I'm taking you off the iron supplements.'

Doing Something About the Weather

Therapy Group For Those Who Are Afraid of Therapy Groups

Right now my brother Al is paying a psychiatrist a hundred bucks an hour to hear his troubles, while I'm drinking beer and telling you mine at happy hour prices. Obviously, Al IS the crazy one.

"Recent studies now show that people who use the aphorism ‘whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ have compromised immune systems."

The Boomerang Sanctions

Today's Topic: "Intelligent Design." Do you believe in "intelligent design"? I did until I met you.

Science deniers Soc.

GOP presidental candidates on science!: 'Billions for astrollogers! Zero for astronomers!' s