Safety Instruction Afficionado T-Shirts

'We're going to be doing a water landing! Please put these on immediately!'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

Baby on board.

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

On the brink.

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

"Helmet, check. Harness, check. Knee and elbow pads, check. You may now push the swing."

'I tell you what: If it weren't for the headrest, I would have serious whiplash right now...'

"We've created a safe, nonjudgmental environment that will leave you child ill-prepared for real life."

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

Job Safety - Pumpkin.

Caution signs.

Mother hen driving with 'Eggs on Board' sign.

Health and safety notice falling on builder.

Daddy showed me why I should always wear my bicycle helmet!

Dr Ed Henderson demonstrates that it IS possible for someone to become too familiar with the safety rules.

'Whoa! This was supposed to be an easy merit badge!'

"Now that's a great number if you want to be protected from the entire environment."

Safety Barriers

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

Sand danger

'So, how bad is it? Who can bring me up to speed?'

'Yeah, the job's got great benefits, but mainly I like the safe work environment.'

'Not without your helmet, you're not!'

'Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to our new 'health and safety' officer.'

Darn it - Every time I try to text, my smart car pulls to the side of the road.