Rustic Life Appreciator T-Shirts

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

Country farmhouse loaf / Inner city highrise loaf.

Thatched roof car.

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

"Life is beautiful, and it's messy."

Meticulously prepared, locally sourced food served on artifacts of a romanticized industrial past, by people who take their fashion cues from daguerreotypes, to adults whose parents still pay their rent.

New from Low-Key Press.

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

"I'm the bluebird of low expectations."

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"You boys who have to take your medications with food, now's the time."

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

'Would Sir care for a hot towel?'

Country life

"And how do expect to pay for this, Mr Morton?"

"My parents are nice, school's going well, and I'm basically a good kid. Unfortunately, there's no money or fame in being normal."

House Hunters of the Old West

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

Life is just four letters...

'You seem to be suffering from frontier mentality...'

Early American Think Tank.

Grandparents with their grandchild

'We like to welcome new team members with three cheers and a wet towel.'

'So you mean to tell me I spent a fortune on years of therapy and a 'tummy rub' was the answer all along?'

"Done already? Wow!" "Yup, a new record. Just under two years."

Related

The singular joy of living with a person who routinely glimpses the miraculous in the mundane.

'Do you have to make that slurping sound when you eat?!'

"Of course it's horse-proof. Everything I own is horse-proof."