Rural Life Aficionados Pillows

"Time change or no time change, I'm gonna crow when I crow."

Please Drove Carefully.

Lamb Noise.

"You keep fumblin' with that bra, Cowboy, and you're never gettin' to second base."

"They’re real."

'I'm collecting manure for my strawberries.' The woman says, 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

"Static cling."

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

'Yes, we have a very diversified economy around here.'

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

Mummy?!

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

"Ok Lassie, cut out the smart arse bit and just herd the sheep."

'Cows have bells because their horns don't work.'

"Welcome to Randolph, Vermont. Don't even think of relocating here!"

Boy, this stuff's hard to swallow!

A cow on a drip.

"I like friut flies!"

'I'm not feeling well. I think I've got human flu.'

'There'll be a special meeting of the board concerning the recent generous contribution of stock.'

Hey there! I thought you guys were extinct!

The physics of the situation had Jed confused. The cow had merely ambled onto the haystack, so was clearly not a leapt-on Yet at the same time, it clearly was a moo-on.

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

Welcome to the urban farm. A bit of country in the city.

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

'Oh Yeah! It's frosty! BOO-YAH!'

"I can't afford to feed you."

I've been doing sit-ups!

'Why should I be scared? I'm not a crow...'