Running Joke Fan Prints

'Good morning boys and girls. Today's lesson is 'running'...sounds simple, but humans make it much more complicated!'

Shampoo.

Cat with Nine Still Lives

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

'Anyone else want to get up and leave before the game is over?'

"Don't you find her work just so wonderfully liberating!"

Traffic Jam

If it's any consolation, you burned the bejeezus out of his finger.

'He finds it easier to fire people this way.'

'After the big race the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

"The genetically modified corn wants us to knock it off with the crop circles."

"Yeah, I'm a Roadrunner, but it is easier on my feet and joints if I run on the grass..."

"It only takes one barrister, but there must be a solicitor present."

Marathon runners in silly costumes.

Hamlet, Chicken of Denmark: 'to cross, or not to cross'

Right Lane Must Hit Tree

Getting the Finger

"Never lend money to anyone over 90."

"I'm sure we've met before... don't tell me your name... don't tell me..."

"You're distant today..."

Jogger with Sweat Shop Shirt

Sworn Anenome

The Why-Can't-This-Event-Be-In-Miles-Like-Other-Sports-In-This-Country 10K

Chinese Burns Unit.

"My doctor just told me to lose 30 pounds. Rufus, Teeny...you're fired."

'Disorganized Crime.'

'Don't look at me that way, I am allergic to being eaten.'

'How's my Husband? Not too well - You're sitting on him!'

"I'm not crossing the road. I'm waiting for an Uber."

'Sorry I'm a little late with today's joke, folks.... I was busy shoveling the global warming off my driveway.'

'There!...NOW do you believe the phone's engaged?!'

A man stands over a dead chicken as it tried to cross the road - "Why?!"