Rulebook Reader Pillows

'Now hold on, Mike. You're talking about embezzlement! And unless I'm very mistaken, that's strictly prohibited in the company's employee handbook!'

"He was right, you know - a queen can move as many spaces as she likes."

'Nice try, Mom! They're pinking shears.'

He waited for the next wave of regulations to arrive.

Baseball Rules Conference. The actions of this runner are prohibited by the current rules. Next slide, please.

No hitting below the belt!

Attorneys at law.

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

Legal? Big-shoed clown prepares to kick field goal.

'By the time I finish explaining the rules, I've lost 'em.'

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

"Sorry, bud. You know the rules... Dibs is dibs."

'You forgot the product label.'

'That's not what is meant by a free kick.'

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

"The bank examiners are here, oh!...I see you already know."

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

'They're doing their tests now?

'There really is no need for confusion. Rule 10, section 5, article a, subsection 3, exception 4 quite clearly states ... '

'I love doing surprise inspections.'

"Welcome to the building, Mrs. Bergdorf. We'd like to go over the condo's rules with you."

"Offside? By a fingertip? It's football not handball!"

Equality in sexes leads to increase in insurance costs.

"Okay, so the object of the game is to get into the most pedantic fight about the rules."

Maze of legalities.

'Could you bring me the new investment regulations you downloaded yesterday?' 'It's still downloading.'

'You'll like it here...it's one of the rules.'

"We have all kinds of Regulatory Guidelines floating around."

"Mr Yomp is in a big hurry, so give him 'speedy runaround number 39'..."

When the feds combine offices: US department of commerce & immigration...importing, exporting, deporting

"It may not be a balk, but it's something."

James Naismith

'Oh for Pete's sake. This ain't nuclear science, gentlemen. I'll read it one more time, but pay attention... 'the infield fly rule is in effect if there is less than two outs and runners on first and second'...'

'Upon further review, the ruling on the field is upheld. The catch was totally constitutional. Touchdown!'