Rule-bending Rover Pillows

"Are you trying to get me nicked."

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

'At Tesmer holdings, we don't break the rules! We change them!'

Fish talking about fisherman

Couple of Pikeys.

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

'Well, I got a hunting license and a fishing license and by golly I'm going to use them.'

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

"Thank you for your e-mail. I will be out on a walk for the next twenty minutes and plan on barking remotely until my return."

Good boy

Walking the Plank.

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

'Attention!! All hands on deck!'

'When you grounded me to my room, you said no TV or computer. You never said I couldn't build my own bike.'

'The tales I could tell, sonny... I've marked my way across 7 continents, from the Kelly green hydrants of Belfast to the salty yellow curbs of old Shanghai...'

"Thanks for walking me home."

"Let 'em try to regulate this!"

"I'm not fishing, I'm hunting."

'I think you are over-reacting Mr. Brown. You were charged a mandatory basic parking fine. I don't think we need to talk about taking your case to the European Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg.'

'Isn't it how you learnt to swim?'

'To become ONE with the Universe, you must first become COMPLIANT with the Universe!'

"When I said let's scuttle her. I meant that ship over there."

"The bad news is my doctor limited me to one glass of wine per day. The good news is I get to pick the glass."

Pirates

A patient's heart monitor reveals he is thinking about fish.

School Boundries.

'What's the point? We're never going to be able to compete with online piracy.'

'That's the guy - lives on a 'narrow boat!'

'D'you moisturise?'

Newly amputated arm points to captain Hooks' cabin.

'Well, you're right, you're not touching the ball with your hands, so the Ref can't penalize you...'

Ambulance towed from a no-parking zone.