Robot Overlord In Training Pillows

'At last! A system with only 1 remote to deal with!'

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

Bot Art: After da Vinci

Super Student

"I'm looking for something really dull and repetitive."

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."

"When you say you're behind me 100%, do you mean base ten or binary?"

Robot Painter

"Why are all of your answers so mechanical?"

"Shouldn't have, you really."

Bot Art: After Mary Cassatt

Employee of the Month

Artificial hearts.

'It just dawned on me that every time we make a phone call, it's a robocall.'

Institute for Artificial Intelligence.

"The difference between us and them is...they can be reproduced by unskilled labour."

'I've got a cape. I think I can make it.'

'Dear, the good doctor appears to have misplaced my file. Can you fax over your copy?'

"No, this is 111110100111101111 ... you want 111110100111101101."

"Howdy folks. My name is Mary-Lou and I'll be your server tonight."

"Sure, he has artificial intelligence, but it's his artificial empathy that won me over."

"They don't appear to want to take over. They just want to dance."

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

Turing Test Today

"I don't know - the minute I figured out how to make it self-aware it realized it was naked, ran, and hid from me."

Machine consciousness - a robot thinking. The thought is in the form of a printed circuit board. The robot is a clockwork toy robot, to emphasise the infancy of the concepts involved

"Who's the new guy?"

'That must be my computer date.'

"Look, I'm doing the human!"

'The really scary part is that he is the new head of human resources.'

"I am your bot server. Page me by phone and tip me in bitcoins."

"No more nuts and bolts for you!"