Rivalry Jester Mugs

Neighbor Leaf Wars

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

That may well be how the catalk models do it, but I still think you look like a three legged horse in a field of cowpats!

'Don't look at me like that! You're the one who wanted to live in a bouncy castle!'

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

The prying mantis,

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"This will be hilarious!"

Your enemy is defeated by Fate

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

Beer Order

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

"Wheeeeeeee!"

Tennis ball girl.

'Since I met you I can't eat...I can't drink...I'm broke.'

"Am I through to the next round?"

"While you're at it Houdini, try and find the last ten years of my life in there."

'Dear, couldn't you spend part of your time actually hunting something?'

'No, there's nothing on my mind, but if there was I don't want to talk about it.'

'It's not that I don't appreciate your efforts to put magic into our marriage...'

"I'm afraid Dad did not leave us anything of value in his will, but his last wish is for us to continue the feud with the neighbour's cat...

"I'm treating you like a living deity for one day."

'I told her my biological clock was going off, and she hit my snooze alarm.'

"George is fluent in two languages. English and total nonsense."

"There's a shortage of beds, dear."

"I'm going to be vacuuming, if you want to go into the farthest room and start asking me questions."

"Oh, come in Blevins. I was just thinking about you."

Cricketer goes for marriage guidance

"Look I've already said, I'm not going to bed with you on our first date"

"How nice. A truffle."

How's your marriage working out? I'm considering the foreign legion...but I doubt whether they'll take her.

KEEP YOUR FRIENDS CLOSE AND YOUR ENEMIES CLOSER, 'That kind of thinking leads to marriage.'